As the year comes to a close I reflect back on 2017. I’d like to say it’s been a happy year but it really hasn’t. There have been happy moments but mostly 2017 was a year of pain, and tears.
2017 was the year I knew my marriage was over. It was the year I learned the man I’d been with for 14 years was a lying, cheat. But it was also the year I gave birth to my 4th child, the year I learned to stand alone. Even as my world fell apart there was joy. Darkness never truly wins, because if you look hard enough, you’ll find light. My husband might have left me pregnant, but when I’m awake at 2am to feed her I don’t wish he was there to help, I’m grateful she’s all mine. That I don’t have to share.
2017 was a year of growth. It was a roller coaster of emotions. And as it comes to a close I am stronger. I’d like to say 2018 will be better, but I’m not sure it will. I know it will be a battle, but the difference is, I no longer fear the fight to come.
So I look forward. I tuck my beautiful children into bed and thank the universe I have them. I focus on the good times, and wish for a happier future.
Merry Christmas everyone, I hope your year was better than mine, and if it wasn’t. Know you are not alone…